An Apology from the Republican Party
Sorry that we can’t answer journalistic questions unless we restrict people and use our sound bites. I guess we are better off using canned lines at road rallies.
Oops, we’re sorry that our canned lines at rallies have repeatedly incited violent threats and racist remarks from our crowds.
Oh yeah, and sorry that we said that these violent and ignorant crowds are the most American parts of the country. Although, we aren’t sure whether we’re apologizing for the implication about other “less-American” parts of the country or for the implication that being racist and violent is a core American value.
And, on that note, sorry that our peers have said any congress people who disagree with our views are also anti-American, even if those views go against the very thread of the Constitution.
But we won’t apologize for the views themselves, because we will just change the Constitution to avoid that issue in the future.
Oh, and we’re sorry that Colin Powell is now backing Obama but we’ll just have to agree to disagree, with this great patriot who may very well be the most respected military figure of the 21st century.
But, and sorry to say, what does he know?
–Joey Flores
The Capitalist Hippie Complex
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